Practicing the Pause

 

 

By Aleah Johnson, The Meadows Alumni Coordinator Have you ever jumped to conclusions, made brash decisions, dove into problem-mode solving mode instead of actively listening, or spoken too soon? I am guilty of all!

The holidays can be a time of cheer, celebration, and love, but they can also bring difficult family dynamics front and center in some households. Through family of origin work, The Meadows helps us understand the different roles family members play, which allows us to learn the skills we need to be successful in our relationships—and in everyday life. Strong relationships are one of the keys to tackling recovery.

More often than not, no matter what our addiction of choice was, you probably had a tendency to use words and actions as weapons, when you should have been using to them to heal and connect. Taking the time to “practice the pause” between your emotional reactions and your actions, helps you to make better choices. Instead of saying something which you will later need to make amends for, you get a chance to reconnect with the present moment, and choose a response that will strengthen your relationships, instead of weaken them.

Relationships aren’t the only place to practice the pause. Life, in general, is in session! We oftentimes forget to intentionally rest, be still, and pause. We take advantage of our go-go momentum and get lost in our own chaos of busyness.
Thoughts, fears, and worries are in full force, which cause us to be on high alert and neglect self-care. Even though it sounds simple, injecting the pause can make a huge difference in your quality of life. After all, isn’t it the little things that make the biggest difference?

How will you practice the pause?

Join Us for the 2017 Meadows Alumni Retreat

The Meadows Alumni Retreat is your opportunity to reconnect, reunite, recharge, and reignite. This retreat is only for those who have participated in one of our 5-day intensive workshops, an intensive outpatient program at The Meadows Outpatient Center, or family week or inpatient treatment at The Meadows, Claudia Black Young Adult Center, Gentle Path at The Meadows, Dawn at The Meadows, Dakota House, or Mellody House. We look forward to creating an unforgettable weekend and reuniting you with your peers!

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Couples Recovering from Sex Addiction Can Reconnect

Relationship

By Dr. Georgia Fourlas, LCSW, LISAC, CSAT, Rio Retreat Center Lead Therapist
There is an indescribable beauty in watching participants move into a deeper level of intimacy after struggling through the destruction of sexual addiction.

How Change Happens

First order change happens when something, usually a behavior, changes to restore balance. Most recovery work begins this way.

The final phase of the Discover to Recovery workshop focuses on making second order change, which happens when a completely new way of seeing things is created, or when a major paradigm shift is internalized. Some people see it as a shift in how we view and maintain first order change. In that way, second order change in couples supports first order change, while allowing a complete transformation in the system of the coupleship.

Second order change for couples involves rewriting a new narrative for the relationship that includes a deeper level of connection and shifts the focus from the issues in the relationship to the process by which couples can deal with those issues. Learning how to interact in more tender, loving, responsive, and emotionally connected ways can promote second order change through the development of a more secure attachment.

An eclectic blend of therapeutic approaches makes this amazing workshop unique. It provides what many experts feel is the missing piece in sexual addiction recovery. Experiential work helps couples achieve deeper connection and move toward second order change. After the pain of disclosure and the vulnerability of emotional impact and emotional restitution, this workshop offers couples the opportunity to truly heal with one another and to achieve a level of attachment and intimacy that they never thought possible—intimacy beyond their wildest dreams.

“This workshop was amazing!” said one of our recent participants. “The structure of the week and the support and guidance of the facilitators provided an atmosphere that allowed my wife and me to change the trajectory of our marriage. It is not often that I am surprised by anything, but this week blew past my expectations. I am more hopeful for my marriage now than I have ever been.”

For more information on the Discovery to Recovery workshop series call 866-977-8770 or visit www.rioretreatcenter.com.

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